Dignity

Good Evening, or whatever is the appropriate greeting to you, in your part of the world.

Well, Alan's Mum is in the 'passing away' stages. She has a rare type of cancer - lymphomic leukemia. She is insistent that she does NOT, I repeat does NOT, want to die in the hospital; and she does NOT want to see the other siblings at the moment. Most importantly, she wants to die with DIGNITY. She is ready; has been for awhile; and wants to meet her Maker. Anyway, she can leave the hospital and pass away in peace. That will be at our old apt; whereby she can look out on a glorious park like setting. Much nicer, than the cold and sterile / empty walls of a hospital. She is going to be receiving 'Paliative Care'; and that being said, her / us will be given some help. There will be a special bed, that is electrical, for her to sit up on; and many other miscellaneous items that the Paliative Care group automatically provide in circumstances, such as this.

The Dad will be staying there as well, as per her wishes; and the 'help' will also keep an eye on him. We are doing our best with Alan's Dad; but he sadly, has 'lost it'. A gold medal goes to all 'care givers'; the patient perseverance and calm compassion, whatever gracious character, they must have to exhibit non stop, in regards to people with severe dementia. Also, Alan's Dad has been 'waited on hand and foot' for 65 years; so he is rather used to being the constant centre of attention. So, this is extra hard on him.

Alan's Mum has stated again, that she only wants GENUINE people at her Memorial Service. That will be, indeed, interesting. Alan will be the recipient of the siblings' wrath and malice; but then what else is new? However, he is following the current wishes of his Mum. Yes, she has the 'Big C'; but her heart has been broken by the siblings; and SHAME ON THEM! (I have written a tidbitz about their unkind behaviour and uncaring attitude in earlier blogs; so you can refer to them, if you wish a bittidz of background).

Tidbit - Well, I will have to follow 'the gold medal' insight; ie continue to have non stop empathy; even under 'trying' times. Praise Him in All Things.

Bittid - Alan has told his Dad that he is going to 'rejoice' in the memory of his Mum; and that he should do likewise; rather than "moping' and feeling sorry for himself. Like, his Mum would not want that; and instead, we should consider her and do the best we can, pulling our weight together. However, easier said than done; but we will do our utmost to provide our best of supportive care and encouragement to all those concerned.

At the 'end of the day', Alan's Dad will be considered as in a 'crisis' situation by the humane health professionals we have been in touch with; and he will be moved to the 'home'; I had referred to earlier today; because he does require 24/7 medical attention / supervision. However, we will make sure we 'get him out' many a time; so that he is not totally 'forgotten'. That happened to him, at the earlier 'establishment'. Bad news, that was.

Anyway, best I go now; there was a quiet tid of a moment; so I could blog for a bit. Please feel free to share a comment, if you are going through or have been through similar 'stuff'.

Unfortunately, it has come to this tragic epitaph; and it did not need to have been this way. A bittidz tidbitz - Work out family / relationship matters; while you still can; before it is too late.

Another tidbitz bittidz, make sure you can sleep at night, with a clear conscience; knowing that, if nothing else, you tried your best to do the 'right' thing. I love the above photo image, of the dear looking little old lady; she looks as if she has enjoyed her life! (The photo is called 'Aging with Dignity'). Her face looks soft and kind; gently weathered; and I hope I look a bittid similar to that photo, when I hit that tidbit 'twilight zone!'

As per her last requests, which we have to respect, she does not wish any more blood or platelet transfusions; she just wants to be now in peaceful and comfortable surroundings; to be left to die with Dignity. She does NOT want to die in the hospital.

Good Night and God Bless.